So, my family was hit by a wave of sickness that was never, EVER, invited in our door. For about 5 weeks one or many of us were down for the count.
I had the flu, D got food poisoning, Pnut got pneumonia (!), Cashew got bronchitis, then D got hit again with a cyst that needed to be addressed with trips to surgical urgent care every other day for two weeks. We were significantly done seeing our health care provider by the end of February.
Some memories to record:
Cashew had his first chest x-ray since Pnut had pnuemonia. It is a torturous looking device. Baby is placed on a mini bicycle seat and there is a clear tube that closes around baby while parent holds baby's arms up in the air. Cashew didn't know whether to cry or let his oral tendencies take hold and lick the x-ray plate (that was hysterical!)
My boy is "hoovering" food down. We switched him to stage 2 foods because he was eating 7 stage 1 containers per day plus cereal added and milk on top of that.
He is rolling back and forth and across the room. He is also sitting up unassisted for bits of time, but still falls over some so he needs some buffers in place.
The boy loves his tongue. He chews on it, sticks it out, uses it to taste everything (including licking your hands if you are not careful)
His laugh is just music to my ears. Today it looked like he waved "hi" to our friend/sitter. Awesome! He also grabs my face and my mom's face and pulls us in for "kisses" Love it!
He is getting really good at holding and drinking from his sippy cup (we started at four months with little sips of water during meals).
Sleeping has been an issue for about a week because he has gotten sick again. We were doing beautifully, but now it is a struggle for me everyday because I have a headache from bad sleep. I don't think that Cashew is being fazed much by it though.
PNUT!
She is a trial to be sure, but with a lot of discussion with her teacher and some flexibility we are so proud of her. We changed behavior monitoring methods from the whole day to one chunk of time that she was struggling to get through. When she does well in that time period the teacher will give her a happy face and extra computer time. The first week she got three happy faces (she went to Grandma's church for Kid's Night Out! they watched a movie and had pizza and she got to hang out with her cousins), I also splurged and got her a pack of donuts (she ate 3 of the 6 and then she had to get another happy face to get the other three).
Week 2 she got 4 happy faces! (That is a huge! deal) we went for a dessert date at Coldst*ne. Daddy was out of town so it was just me and the nuts.
We are in Week 3 and we already have 3 happy faces. 2 more and my pnut is FINALLY going to get her reward of a trip to Golf and Stuff. This has been our deal since December and with the old behavior methods in place it wasnt' working for her. Her teacher is very happy with the improvment and is thinking of adding a 2nd happy face for each day for not talking excessively. (What can I say, she's my kid!)
Cashew LOVES his Sissy. D will tell you that he smiles at me, he smiles at D, but that boy's face lights up for his Sissy. She loves him too, sometimes too much, but we are trying to find a balance.
***
D has been working a lot of overtime for the last three months. He has been really hard being essentially a single parent, but he still comes home every night so that is good. My mom has been helping to watch the nuts so I can still go to choir on Wednesdays and D can come home and eat dinner and help put them to bed. It is SUCH a blessing to have family close by.
***
I decided about 6 weeks ago that I was TIRED of my cooking. Either I had to figure out a change or we would be eating out a lot. So, taking a page from a friend I sat down and plotted out 2 weeks worth of dinners and made a shopping list. I asked D about some things he would like me to make, have been digging into things I grew up eating and researching new by looking through cookbooks. In six weeks we have had only ONE meal repeat. It has been such a reprieve, and a great challenge for me to stock more fruits and veggies, really inventory what we have so that I only make BIG grocery trips every two weeks. This includes buying baby food for Cashew. We still have milk, soda, and bread trips off track from those buying trips, but I feel great about it. I have also tried to institute a "Sunday" dinner type plan. So far I have made fried chicken, ham, steak, sour cream chicken enchiladas, and family oldie No Peek Chicken. This Sunday it is Pasta Carbonara (I love this one, hello, it has bacon in it!) I don't do anything too large, but having different foods go through our house has been nice.
I can't believe that Cashew is 7 months old. Last month was fun because I got to say I had a 6 year old and a 6 month old. Now 7 months is that corner that has been turned and that big 1 is off in the distance. I don't really like this. I want my boy to stay a baby for some more time.
He is such a sweet boy. He has a temper, but for 95% of the time he is a mellow, sweet and just precious child. I am writing this in hopes that in years to come when I look at this when said precious boy is making me want to tear my hairout I will remember his soft, firm chubby cheeks, toothless smile, musical giggles, and remember when I was his WHOLE world and still love him just as much despite anything he may do as a big kid. I do this with Pnut a lot. I think about the little girl who would wrap her arms around you as you carried her and she would pat YOU on the back to soothe you like we would do to her. *Sigh* that is what memories are for. Remembering the little things that melt your heart so that when things get hard you have a sweet moment to think of and get you through the chaos.
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Friday, January 13, 2012
New Year Revelations and Documenting :)
It's been a while I know, Cashew is 4 1/2 months old! We have celebrated our first Thanksgiving and Christmas as a family of four, had friends stay with us, enjoyed a great New Year, and of course discovered some new things.
Pnut has been struggling a little bit with self control and staying on task in school. She is wonderful academically, but can't seem to click with her behavior. We are trying the best we can to help her, but it is definitely a challenge. She had a lot of fun playing with her friends that visited with us for a week. They played outside a lot, which was wonderful for the adults!
Cashew is growing by leaps and bounds. Since birth he has grown 7 inches. He currently is around 17.5 pounds. We started him on baby cereal at exactly 4 months and he opened wide for it! There was no pushing it around or spitting it out like Sissy, no way. It is a trip to feed him. He reminds me of a story my mom told me about how my Grandma Kooiman used to enjoy feeding my brother because he just opened wide with no spillage and would scream at you if you didn't shovel it in fast enough, yeah that seems to be Cashew.
The boy loves his hands. He will suck on his fingers, chew on them or yours if he can get to them. He is a master at making himself bounce in his bouncy seat and is started to roll back and forth on his back to his side. He is so expressive. His whole face lights us when he sees someone he recognizes. His giggle is great, but his laugh in infectuous! He is a little bit ticklish so there is lots of fun to be had with that. And he always, ALWAYS smiles when his Sissy comes near him and hugs him from behind.
We had a miscommunication, that boy and I. Getting him to sleep at night had been going great, and he had been waking only once a night. BEAUTIFUL right? Well, suddenly he was taking 3 hours to get to sleep and waking up at least 3 times a night. He wouldn't nurse well. He would go for about 5 minutes and then stop, look up at me and think it was time to smile, goo and gah at me. After enduring this for about a week I finally figured it out. (My sleep deprived brain was running on empty and I was fading fast). I gave him a bottle of milk instead of nursing him, and he fell right to sleep after. Hmm. Then I fed him cereal two hours later, and another bottle of milk two hours later and shock of all shocks THE CHILD WENT RIGHT TO SLEEP.
It hurts my heart a little bit to realize he was hungry the whole time and not just being stubborn, but it feels so good to know that it was an easy fix. Plus the child is my child and is just too nosy to nurse well during the day. So much to see, no time for anything else. :)
TMI ALERT
So I am pumping like three times a day now to make sure he is still getting enough. It is a hassle, but to me it is so worth it. I feel blessed to be able to do this for Cashew. I wish I had been better informed and maybe not as stressed when Pnut was an infant to do the same, but with the other medical issues I had going on with myself during my nursing time with her, I don't think it would have worked as well.
Plus, we have now moved on to putting him in bed awake to let him get himself to sleep. Plus, if he wakes at night it is because he has lost his paci. Once it is replaced back to sleep he goes. So, as soon as he gets the hand-eye coordination down to put his own paci back in, oh goodness that will be a MARVELOUS day.
Finding a balance with both kids is hard. I find myself drawn to Cashew more because he needs me, but at the same time I want to continue to give Pnut as much encouragement and support that I can, when she will take it.
On a side note that I have to document :) I have lost 35 pounds since having Cashew. I am not by far at a healthy weight, but it is nice to fit into a size I haven't been in since 2001. I didn't gain a single pound with Cashew so when I had him, I feel like I kinda melted. D gives me hugs and says I'm small :D I had someone ask me today if I was a size 10 (bless their hearts I almost kissed them) which I am not, but it was a wonderful compliment in its own right.
It makes me sad Cashew is growing so fast, but I love my kids so much. I am so excited to see how Cashew will continue to grow. Pnut just keeps surprising me with her brain and I know there is going to come a day when she actually does know more than me. My fear is that that day may be, oh like, tomorrow!
Pnut has been struggling a little bit with self control and staying on task in school. She is wonderful academically, but can't seem to click with her behavior. We are trying the best we can to help her, but it is definitely a challenge. She had a lot of fun playing with her friends that visited with us for a week. They played outside a lot, which was wonderful for the adults!
Cashew is growing by leaps and bounds. Since birth he has grown 7 inches. He currently is around 17.5 pounds. We started him on baby cereal at exactly 4 months and he opened wide for it! There was no pushing it around or spitting it out like Sissy, no way. It is a trip to feed him. He reminds me of a story my mom told me about how my Grandma Kooiman used to enjoy feeding my brother because he just opened wide with no spillage and would scream at you if you didn't shovel it in fast enough, yeah that seems to be Cashew.
The boy loves his hands. He will suck on his fingers, chew on them or yours if he can get to them. He is a master at making himself bounce in his bouncy seat and is started to roll back and forth on his back to his side. He is so expressive. His whole face lights us when he sees someone he recognizes. His giggle is great, but his laugh in infectuous! He is a little bit ticklish so there is lots of fun to be had with that. And he always, ALWAYS smiles when his Sissy comes near him and hugs him from behind.
We had a miscommunication, that boy and I. Getting him to sleep at night had been going great, and he had been waking only once a night. BEAUTIFUL right? Well, suddenly he was taking 3 hours to get to sleep and waking up at least 3 times a night. He wouldn't nurse well. He would go for about 5 minutes and then stop, look up at me and think it was time to smile, goo and gah at me. After enduring this for about a week I finally figured it out. (My sleep deprived brain was running on empty and I was fading fast). I gave him a bottle of milk instead of nursing him, and he fell right to sleep after. Hmm. Then I fed him cereal two hours later, and another bottle of milk two hours later and shock of all shocks THE CHILD WENT RIGHT TO SLEEP.
It hurts my heart a little bit to realize he was hungry the whole time and not just being stubborn, but it feels so good to know that it was an easy fix. Plus the child is my child and is just too nosy to nurse well during the day. So much to see, no time for anything else. :)
TMI ALERT
So I am pumping like three times a day now to make sure he is still getting enough. It is a hassle, but to me it is so worth it. I feel blessed to be able to do this for Cashew. I wish I had been better informed and maybe not as stressed when Pnut was an infant to do the same, but with the other medical issues I had going on with myself during my nursing time with her, I don't think it would have worked as well.
Plus, we have now moved on to putting him in bed awake to let him get himself to sleep. Plus, if he wakes at night it is because he has lost his paci. Once it is replaced back to sleep he goes. So, as soon as he gets the hand-eye coordination down to put his own paci back in, oh goodness that will be a MARVELOUS day.
Finding a balance with both kids is hard. I find myself drawn to Cashew more because he needs me, but at the same time I want to continue to give Pnut as much encouragement and support that I can, when she will take it.
On a side note that I have to document :) I have lost 35 pounds since having Cashew. I am not by far at a healthy weight, but it is nice to fit into a size I haven't been in since 2001. I didn't gain a single pound with Cashew so when I had him, I feel like I kinda melted. D gives me hugs and says I'm small :D I had someone ask me today if I was a size 10 (bless their hearts I almost kissed them) which I am not, but it was a wonderful compliment in its own right.
It makes me sad Cashew is growing so fast, but I love my kids so much. I am so excited to see how Cashew will continue to grow. Pnut just keeps surprising me with her brain and I know there is going to come a day when she actually does know more than me. My fear is that that day may be, oh like, tomorrow!
Saturday, November 5, 2011
10 weeks later
I went back to work two weeks ago. It has been a lot easier than I expected. I have good students (so far) who had a substitute who I have know for a few years and they were jumpstarted well. Pnut is back to her before school care (I asked the supervisor if she was ready for her and she responded Yes!). It is nice to know that she is loved by so many around her.
Pnut's teacher is 100 times better than her kindergarten teacher. We get weekly feedback on how she is doing in class, I have not received any notes, and when Pnut tells me she has lost recess or received warnings her reasons are valid and appropriate. Pnut is doing fabulously in school (aside from her chatty, bossy, nature); her grades are excellent on her tests, she zips through homework and is in the higher reading group. This means she has mastered the first set of 100 high frequency words and can start the online reading program. She reads books and takes comprehension tests based on those books to earn points (it is like Ac*lerated Re@der if you are familiar with that). Her second set of 100 words have come home and some examples of words my Nut will know are: following, answer, American, thorough!
My boy Cashew. I knew when I found out I would have a boy I would have a little bit of gender depression (I think it lasted like week) and now I LOVE my BOY so much. He makes me smile even when he is cranky. He is doing well with all his friends at daycare. They love him and he has done well. Of the 10 days at daycare so far I think he has only had one rough day.
He had his 2 month check up yesterday (even though he is 10 weeks). My darling boy is 14.3 pounds, 24 inches long (half the size of his sissy!) and doing well. The doctor mentioned he had a nicely shaped head and asked if we laid him flat a lot. I said, except for sleeping at night and changing diapers he doesn't lay flat. The boy is held, sits in a swing or bouncy seat, naps propped on a nursing pillow, and is elevated for baths. He should not have a flat head :) I don't see Cashew as a chubby, he is just big in all areas. He is wearing 3 month or as big as 3-6 month clothes, size 2 diapers and chowed down on a 6 oz bottle yesterday for his sitter.
Cashew typically is doing 5-6 hour stretches of sleep in the beginning of the night as well. Around week 6 I figured my boy out and life has been a little better for us. He is not completely routined, but he has cues that make my life so much simpler. With these cues I have been able to return to choir on Sunday morning; I even send Cashew home with Daddy on choir practice nights. He is a wake, eat, play, sleep child. So much better than the napping battles from before.
I love him. His faces are precious. He is gaining so much more personality. He has some great smiles and gets very fidgety and excited (he kind of pants like a dog and purses his lips) when you talk to him. He chatters more at you when he is getting upset and has the odd comfort mechanism of liking the burp cloth over his face to sleep. I don't remember a lot of these things with Pnut, but I'm glad I get to experience them again.
Pnut is a great sissy. She wants to help so much that sometimes we have to tell her to back off some. She can give him a paci when we can't, she reads to him, talks to him and just likes to be by him.
Returning to work has been patience testing with getting out the door, but we are getting it done and for that I am glad. I am getting used to referring to them, they and the kids more. After six years of her, she, and our kid, the new references are hard rolling off the tongue, but I can't imagine not having the boy here now.
Pnut's teacher is 100 times better than her kindergarten teacher. We get weekly feedback on how she is doing in class, I have not received any notes, and when Pnut tells me she has lost recess or received warnings her reasons are valid and appropriate. Pnut is doing fabulously in school (aside from her chatty, bossy, nature); her grades are excellent on her tests, she zips through homework and is in the higher reading group. This means she has mastered the first set of 100 high frequency words and can start the online reading program. She reads books and takes comprehension tests based on those books to earn points (it is like Ac*lerated Re@der if you are familiar with that). Her second set of 100 words have come home and some examples of words my Nut will know are: following, answer, American, thorough!
My boy Cashew. I knew when I found out I would have a boy I would have a little bit of gender depression (I think it lasted like week) and now I LOVE my BOY so much. He makes me smile even when he is cranky. He is doing well with all his friends at daycare. They love him and he has done well. Of the 10 days at daycare so far I think he has only had one rough day.
He had his 2 month check up yesterday (even though he is 10 weeks). My darling boy is 14.3 pounds, 24 inches long (half the size of his sissy!) and doing well. The doctor mentioned he had a nicely shaped head and asked if we laid him flat a lot. I said, except for sleeping at night and changing diapers he doesn't lay flat. The boy is held, sits in a swing or bouncy seat, naps propped on a nursing pillow, and is elevated for baths. He should not have a flat head :) I don't see Cashew as a chubby, he is just big in all areas. He is wearing 3 month or as big as 3-6 month clothes, size 2 diapers and chowed down on a 6 oz bottle yesterday for his sitter.
Cashew typically is doing 5-6 hour stretches of sleep in the beginning of the night as well. Around week 6 I figured my boy out and life has been a little better for us. He is not completely routined, but he has cues that make my life so much simpler. With these cues I have been able to return to choir on Sunday morning; I even send Cashew home with Daddy on choir practice nights. He is a wake, eat, play, sleep child. So much better than the napping battles from before.
I love him. His faces are precious. He is gaining so much more personality. He has some great smiles and gets very fidgety and excited (he kind of pants like a dog and purses his lips) when you talk to him. He chatters more at you when he is getting upset and has the odd comfort mechanism of liking the burp cloth over his face to sleep. I don't remember a lot of these things with Pnut, but I'm glad I get to experience them again.
Pnut is a great sissy. She wants to help so much that sometimes we have to tell her to back off some. She can give him a paci when we can't, she reads to him, talks to him and just likes to be by him.
Returning to work has been patience testing with getting out the door, but we are getting it done and for that I am glad. I am getting used to referring to them, they and the kids more. After six years of her, she, and our kid, the new references are hard rolling off the tongue, but I can't imagine not having the boy here now.
Friday, September 30, 2011
More of a reflective journal entry :)
Where did that time go? Our first week was a blur with the daily visits to the doctor's office for bilirubin checks and now suddenly it is 5 weeks later.
Cashew is definitely different than Pnut. He has a completely different personality, the first part being he is addicted to "Mommy Smell". I tease that he has different types of narcolepsy (sp?). Mommy narcolepsy, car narcolepsy, etc. I also say that he goes into milk comas. I think it is just so dang adorable when he finishes eating, you sit him up to burp and he has this content look on his face and milk all over it and his head is just flopped to the side. But if you put him in the M@by Wrap against my chest he is OUT. I'm talking snoring, restful bliss OUT.
Pnut started first grade so my days are not as lounging as most would think. D went back to work after two weeks and my mommy carpooling duties began. It is not as bad as I thought it would be. I am pretty organized with getting Pnut out the door, especially since I don't have to get myself ready yet. Three more weeks and we will see how organized I am to get three of us out the door ready instead of just one. I will definity miss just throwing on a sweatshirt with my pj bottoms and some flip flops to take Pnut to school.
Pnut is now taking the bus home and we are "training"/teaching her to walk home. We live in a relatively quiet track and the bus stop is a little over a half mile from our house on residential streets. My daughter, let's say gently, lacks focus sometimes. At least she lacks focus on what she should be paying attention to instead of what she wants to pay attention to. Thus the "training". I wait different distances from the bus stop and she is learning to "walk with purpose" (as I tell my students who are tardy) from the bus, as well as to cross (gasp!) 3 streets by herself. So far she is at only crossing one street. I remember walking home (2 little blocks weren't so bad, but one of our blocks is equivalent to the two I walked home it seems) and staying in the house for like 30 minutes until my dad got home. Pnut doing this boggles my brain! Luckily 4 days out of the week she will get home around the time one of us does. Does everyone see me stepping out of my comfort zone with this monumental task? I think I am more nervous than Pnut.
Cashew is very trial and error. We have had many battles, that boy and I. Afternoon napping is the big one. Unfortunately because of sissy needing to be picked up right when my little old man should be relaxing into a nap, sometimes the timing gets screwed up and the nap doesn't happen until, oh, dinnertime, or an hour before he is due a bath and then hopefully to go to bed. I had one really bad day where I lacked sleep and Cashew just didn't want to nap at all. Let me explain nap. Though I love holding my son, nap does not equal ON me every time. I would like to, you know, eat or go to the bathroom, or just have a moment for me while he sleeps in his bed (or on my bed, or in the swing, or on the couch, just NOT on me for a minute), however he sometimes has other ideas and our battle begins. Sometimes I win, sometimes he gives in after a time.
I am learning him that is for sure. He does not have a set pattern. What worked one day doesn't necessarily work the next. Swaddling him in a blanket will only work for half the night, then he gets irritated. Sometimes he is a tummy sleeper, sometimes a back, sometimes propped on the nursing pillow. He also is not only gassy so we have to deal with trying to make him comfortable (I don't care if the doctor says he isn't hurting when he strains, uh, it DOES and I know it does, but that is for an entirely different blog), AND he has slight reflux so he will spit up slightly, not all the time (even while propped up) and if he hasn't been burped properly (which is a struggle as well) he will get the hiccoughs MULTIPLE TIMES A DAY! Deep, hollow hiccoughs that make you feel so bad for him because you know that it makes your stomach hurt just thinking about it.
But, he smiles in his sleep, and he even has laughed in his sleep (I know right?) He is starting to coo a little more and he has an ear splitting scream. When he is really mad he sounds like a possessed gremlin (you have to experience it, D thought I was crazy until he heard it). Pnut loves him and can calm him down better than us sometimes, not to mention it is AWESOME having her in the back seat to give him the paci if he is getting fussy. He is a cuddler and needs to be held very securely to go to sleep sometimes. He EATS well. He is a little over 11 pounds and you could say is is chunky, but he isn't. He is nicely filled out and sometimes when you look at him he still just seems small. His cheeks are just so darn kissable and I love when he tries to "eat" my face when I am kissing her cheeks. When we visit his soon to be daycare next door he sits and watches the little kids and there are a few of them that just love him to pieces already.
I know there are still going to be so many adjustments to get used to in having a boy, but I'm good. My Cashew is already a much loved boy. From his family, to his friends, to his church family. I took him to choir practice this past week and he slept in the wrap the whole time. But it made my heart happy when I was getting out of the car beforehand and the accompanist for the choir arrived too. We said hello and I said, "I thought I would let everybody sing to him!" to which Mr. Real replied, "That's a good thing, he belongs to a lot of people in there." And he does! Cashew has been in choir since conception :) And we are so lucky to have SO many people love him, and his sister, so much.
Cashew is definitely different than Pnut. He has a completely different personality, the first part being he is addicted to "Mommy Smell". I tease that he has different types of narcolepsy (sp?). Mommy narcolepsy, car narcolepsy, etc. I also say that he goes into milk comas. I think it is just so dang adorable when he finishes eating, you sit him up to burp and he has this content look on his face and milk all over it and his head is just flopped to the side. But if you put him in the M@by Wrap against my chest he is OUT. I'm talking snoring, restful bliss OUT.
Pnut started first grade so my days are not as lounging as most would think. D went back to work after two weeks and my mommy carpooling duties began. It is not as bad as I thought it would be. I am pretty organized with getting Pnut out the door, especially since I don't have to get myself ready yet. Three more weeks and we will see how organized I am to get three of us out the door ready instead of just one. I will definity miss just throwing on a sweatshirt with my pj bottoms and some flip flops to take Pnut to school.
Pnut is now taking the bus home and we are "training"/teaching her to walk home. We live in a relatively quiet track and the bus stop is a little over a half mile from our house on residential streets. My daughter, let's say gently, lacks focus sometimes. At least she lacks focus on what she should be paying attention to instead of what she wants to pay attention to. Thus the "training". I wait different distances from the bus stop and she is learning to "walk with purpose" (as I tell my students who are tardy) from the bus, as well as to cross (gasp!) 3 streets by herself. So far she is at only crossing one street. I remember walking home (2 little blocks weren't so bad, but one of our blocks is equivalent to the two I walked home it seems) and staying in the house for like 30 minutes until my dad got home. Pnut doing this boggles my brain! Luckily 4 days out of the week she will get home around the time one of us does. Does everyone see me stepping out of my comfort zone with this monumental task? I think I am more nervous than Pnut.
Cashew is very trial and error. We have had many battles, that boy and I. Afternoon napping is the big one. Unfortunately because of sissy needing to be picked up right when my little old man should be relaxing into a nap, sometimes the timing gets screwed up and the nap doesn't happen until, oh, dinnertime, or an hour before he is due a bath and then hopefully to go to bed. I had one really bad day where I lacked sleep and Cashew just didn't want to nap at all. Let me explain nap. Though I love holding my son, nap does not equal ON me every time. I would like to, you know, eat or go to the bathroom, or just have a moment for me while he sleeps in his bed (or on my bed, or in the swing, or on the couch, just NOT on me for a minute), however he sometimes has other ideas and our battle begins. Sometimes I win, sometimes he gives in after a time.
I am learning him that is for sure. He does not have a set pattern. What worked one day doesn't necessarily work the next. Swaddling him in a blanket will only work for half the night, then he gets irritated. Sometimes he is a tummy sleeper, sometimes a back, sometimes propped on the nursing pillow. He also is not only gassy so we have to deal with trying to make him comfortable (I don't care if the doctor says he isn't hurting when he strains, uh, it DOES and I know it does, but that is for an entirely different blog), AND he has slight reflux so he will spit up slightly, not all the time (even while propped up) and if he hasn't been burped properly (which is a struggle as well) he will get the hiccoughs MULTIPLE TIMES A DAY! Deep, hollow hiccoughs that make you feel so bad for him because you know that it makes your stomach hurt just thinking about it.
But, he smiles in his sleep, and he even has laughed in his sleep (I know right?) He is starting to coo a little more and he has an ear splitting scream. When he is really mad he sounds like a possessed gremlin (you have to experience it, D thought I was crazy until he heard it). Pnut loves him and can calm him down better than us sometimes, not to mention it is AWESOME having her in the back seat to give him the paci if he is getting fussy. He is a cuddler and needs to be held very securely to go to sleep sometimes. He EATS well. He is a little over 11 pounds and you could say is is chunky, but he isn't. He is nicely filled out and sometimes when you look at him he still just seems small. His cheeks are just so darn kissable and I love when he tries to "eat" my face when I am kissing her cheeks. When we visit his soon to be daycare next door he sits and watches the little kids and there are a few of them that just love him to pieces already.
I know there are still going to be so many adjustments to get used to in having a boy, but I'm good. My Cashew is already a much loved boy. From his family, to his friends, to his church family. I took him to choir practice this past week and he slept in the wrap the whole time. But it made my heart happy when I was getting out of the car beforehand and the accompanist for the choir arrived too. We said hello and I said, "I thought I would let everybody sing to him!" to which Mr. Real replied, "That's a good thing, he belongs to a lot of people in there." And he does! Cashew has been in choir since conception :) And we are so lucky to have SO many people love him, and his sister, so much.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
The Birth of the Cutest Old Man Baby :)
WARNING: There may be TMI for some of you in this (i.e. catheters, cords, etc) and it is REALLY LONG!
My last post talked about my choice to have a C-section. I never knew how ironic that post would turn out to be, because as it turns out, it was a blessing to have a C-Section.
D and I arrived on time to the hospital and entered triage to a silent room. There was no hustle and bustle, in fact when I mentioned it the nurse shushed me! :) I was put into a room, changed and they gave me my IV. My doctor had wanted me to have an entire bag and a half of fluid before surgery. That stuff is cold mind you and D and I laughed at how cold my arm got. The nurse made me laugh because she said the first bag wasn't going in fast enough. I was really calm during my two hours in triage. I wasn't able to update my statuses on FB, but I was able to text message so my friend J updated on FB for me. Yes, I am a crazy person about FB, I admit it!
Even when the anesthesiologist came in I was fine. He asked me questions which I answered. He explained different scenarios about what I should and should not feel (I was completely asleep for my last one). I was good, even making some jokes. Then the surgical nurse came and my gut dropped. D followed us and the nurse let him into the recovery room to wait for someone to come get him. I became a shivering, almost hysterical wreck. But not hysterical as in screaming. I just started crying silently, my nerves had set in quickly and I was trying to be calm. I prayed, I breathed, and I silently did what I was told. Then the nurse saw and immediately got super close and tried to reassure me. She told me I should be happy and that there was nothing to worry about, which I knew, but my nerves are a funny mess of emotions for me and it took me a little bit to calm down. Then the anesthesiologist did my spinal and I started getting nervous all over again! Cried some more, but settled more easily. They laid me down and everything started to go numb and I was so happy that it did. It is the weirdest sensation I have ever experienced. I did get sick a little from my blood pressure leveling out, but it quickly went away and I realized: I WAS LAYING ON MY BACK AND IT FELT MARVELOUS!
They brought D in just after they started giving me some oxygen. Unfortunately I started itching all over my face and could barely hold D's hand because I was itching my face (around the mask, my eyes, forehead, etc.) The anesthesiologist let me take the mask off and I believe he began to give me benadryl through me IV because I really became calm after that. The doctors were working and I thought at any moment Cashew was going to be born, but the waiting just kept on.
We didn't think anything was wrong, but we realized soon that something was taking too long. It turns out during my previous two surgeries things had shifted inside and my bladder was in the wrong place. Now I don't know anything about anatomy, but my doctor was concerned about identifying where my bladder was and making sure not to harm it. So they had to do some inflating my bladder with blue dye backwards through my catheter. That way if my doctor nicked my bladder he would know. That craziness lasted for almost an hour. My surgery started around 11:40am.
At 12:35 Cashew was born. It was so quick. One minute the room was fairly quiet, the next you could hear our little man crying loudly. Then the doctor said, "Oh wow. There's a true knot." Now, if you are "ER" fans you will remember that Carter's baby died in utero because of a true knot. It is where the baby has flipped and flopped around and created a knot in the umbilical cord. Carter's baby's knot tightened to the point of oxygen deprevation and the baby died. Cashew's knot was loose, but large. He also had a REALLY long cord. So, if I think too hard about what could have happened during a vaginal delivery I shiver a little bit.
Poor D almost couldn't go see Cashew on the warming table because it was across the room and on the other side of the curtain protecting him from see me all open and stuff. You know the whole road precaution about driving and oncoming traffic headlights are blinding you? Look at the lines on the road, that's what D had to do. A few minutes after he went over there the anesthesiologist asked if D wanted to see the knot, D said no, I said YES! So the anesthesiologist took the camera from D and took a picture of it for me :) D brought Cashew over and held him to my face so I could just nuzzle on him and kiss him. It was really nice to just feel him. D was crying a bit, which the nurse that had taken care of me while I cried was just floored over.
My procedure also included a tubal ligation so I assumed that is what happened after that. I had a lot of scar tissue from previous surgeries and as the doctors were working I started to feel more pressure and some of it was not very comfortable. As they continued to work and I said ow a few more times than the anesthesiologist liked, he finally said he was going to give me a sedative. D and Cashew were led out by a nurse, which I knew would happen eventually.
I then woke up in recovery. I looked at the clock across the room and it said 2:30! D was there and so was my BFF Jill. As soon as I woke up, I wanted my baby and I got him. I was so shocked to see how much he looked like Pnut. So much so that they could have been identical. I immediately noticed all the hair he had, but I also noticed differences ( his lips are smaller, his ears are mine instead of D's). He had not a piece out of place.
My surgery had so many ups and downs to it, but there is such a large blessing in my decision to have a C-section. My doctor says my surgery was the hardest he has every done. I had lots of scarring, lots of bleeding (which upon blood work it was decided I didn't need to receive any blood), and then there was the bladder thing. The easiest part of my surgery was delivering Cashew. They did give me some general anesthetic, it is my assumption that because of the length of time it was taking my spinal was beginning to fade. Not to mention the next 24 hours of me receiving benadryl every hour because it seems I am allergic to the numbing agent they put in your back first before the spinal. I swear I thought I was going to scratch my skin off!
I held off on major pain medication for about 18 hours as well. I only took one shot and then everything was oral meds from then on.
Cashew is definitely different from his sister. He is a fussypants as I call him, but each day as he gets used to the world he is less fussy. He lets you know what he wants, but at the same time what he does and doesn't like. He definitly looks like his daddy. Oh my goodness does he look like his daddy. The hairline just does it for you. But he has this little old man look to him as well. He doesn't look like a baby, but a miniature adult. His eyebrows and eyelashes are so light or nonexisten that his face is just so gorgeous to me. When he sleeps on your shoulder his face looks completely like a baby, but when you lay him in the bed and look at him, it's the little old man face. When he is awake he has the brightest eyes and I can't wait to see what color they turn out to be ( our options are dark brown or light brown so not much mystery, but still).
I am so happy he is here. Pnut is trying to be a good helper and a great big sister. She has gotten better about not being so touchy. She really wants to help though so we are working our way through certain things. She started first grade yesterday so she is busy that way now as well.
It was a long journey to get our little man here. Lots of ultrasounds, no weight gain :) but lots of discomfort. I am happy to be in my bed again and be able to lay comfortably. My joints don't hurt anymore, my leg is no longer numb.
Cashew is almost two weeks old and I drove yesterday. Long trips are not in my future for another two or three weeks, but around town I am ok. No heavy lifting except my boy and maybe a gallon of milk. Thank you for all the prayers, visits, and meals! If you are looking for pics, please visit my FB, there are always new ones going up :)
My last post talked about my choice to have a C-section. I never knew how ironic that post would turn out to be, because as it turns out, it was a blessing to have a C-Section.
D and I arrived on time to the hospital and entered triage to a silent room. There was no hustle and bustle, in fact when I mentioned it the nurse shushed me! :) I was put into a room, changed and they gave me my IV. My doctor had wanted me to have an entire bag and a half of fluid before surgery. That stuff is cold mind you and D and I laughed at how cold my arm got. The nurse made me laugh because she said the first bag wasn't going in fast enough. I was really calm during my two hours in triage. I wasn't able to update my statuses on FB, but I was able to text message so my friend J updated on FB for me. Yes, I am a crazy person about FB, I admit it!
Even when the anesthesiologist came in I was fine. He asked me questions which I answered. He explained different scenarios about what I should and should not feel (I was completely asleep for my last one). I was good, even making some jokes. Then the surgical nurse came and my gut dropped. D followed us and the nurse let him into the recovery room to wait for someone to come get him. I became a shivering, almost hysterical wreck. But not hysterical as in screaming. I just started crying silently, my nerves had set in quickly and I was trying to be calm. I prayed, I breathed, and I silently did what I was told. Then the nurse saw and immediately got super close and tried to reassure me. She told me I should be happy and that there was nothing to worry about, which I knew, but my nerves are a funny mess of emotions for me and it took me a little bit to calm down. Then the anesthesiologist did my spinal and I started getting nervous all over again! Cried some more, but settled more easily. They laid me down and everything started to go numb and I was so happy that it did. It is the weirdest sensation I have ever experienced. I did get sick a little from my blood pressure leveling out, but it quickly went away and I realized: I WAS LAYING ON MY BACK AND IT FELT MARVELOUS!
They brought D in just after they started giving me some oxygen. Unfortunately I started itching all over my face and could barely hold D's hand because I was itching my face (around the mask, my eyes, forehead, etc.) The anesthesiologist let me take the mask off and I believe he began to give me benadryl through me IV because I really became calm after that. The doctors were working and I thought at any moment Cashew was going to be born, but the waiting just kept on.
We didn't think anything was wrong, but we realized soon that something was taking too long. It turns out during my previous two surgeries things had shifted inside and my bladder was in the wrong place. Now I don't know anything about anatomy, but my doctor was concerned about identifying where my bladder was and making sure not to harm it. So they had to do some inflating my bladder with blue dye backwards through my catheter. That way if my doctor nicked my bladder he would know. That craziness lasted for almost an hour. My surgery started around 11:40am.
At 12:35 Cashew was born. It was so quick. One minute the room was fairly quiet, the next you could hear our little man crying loudly. Then the doctor said, "Oh wow. There's a true knot." Now, if you are "ER" fans you will remember that Carter's baby died in utero because of a true knot. It is where the baby has flipped and flopped around and created a knot in the umbilical cord. Carter's baby's knot tightened to the point of oxygen deprevation and the baby died. Cashew's knot was loose, but large. He also had a REALLY long cord. So, if I think too hard about what could have happened during a vaginal delivery I shiver a little bit.
Poor D almost couldn't go see Cashew on the warming table because it was across the room and on the other side of the curtain protecting him from see me all open and stuff. You know the whole road precaution about driving and oncoming traffic headlights are blinding you? Look at the lines on the road, that's what D had to do. A few minutes after he went over there the anesthesiologist asked if D wanted to see the knot, D said no, I said YES! So the anesthesiologist took the camera from D and took a picture of it for me :) D brought Cashew over and held him to my face so I could just nuzzle on him and kiss him. It was really nice to just feel him. D was crying a bit, which the nurse that had taken care of me while I cried was just floored over.
My procedure also included a tubal ligation so I assumed that is what happened after that. I had a lot of scar tissue from previous surgeries and as the doctors were working I started to feel more pressure and some of it was not very comfortable. As they continued to work and I said ow a few more times than the anesthesiologist liked, he finally said he was going to give me a sedative. D and Cashew were led out by a nurse, which I knew would happen eventually.
I then woke up in recovery. I looked at the clock across the room and it said 2:30! D was there and so was my BFF Jill. As soon as I woke up, I wanted my baby and I got him. I was so shocked to see how much he looked like Pnut. So much so that they could have been identical. I immediately noticed all the hair he had, but I also noticed differences ( his lips are smaller, his ears are mine instead of D's). He had not a piece out of place.
My surgery had so many ups and downs to it, but there is such a large blessing in my decision to have a C-section. My doctor says my surgery was the hardest he has every done. I had lots of scarring, lots of bleeding (which upon blood work it was decided I didn't need to receive any blood), and then there was the bladder thing. The easiest part of my surgery was delivering Cashew. They did give me some general anesthetic, it is my assumption that because of the length of time it was taking my spinal was beginning to fade. Not to mention the next 24 hours of me receiving benadryl every hour because it seems I am allergic to the numbing agent they put in your back first before the spinal. I swear I thought I was going to scratch my skin off!
I held off on major pain medication for about 18 hours as well. I only took one shot and then everything was oral meds from then on.
Cashew is definitely different from his sister. He is a fussypants as I call him, but each day as he gets used to the world he is less fussy. He lets you know what he wants, but at the same time what he does and doesn't like. He definitly looks like his daddy. Oh my goodness does he look like his daddy. The hairline just does it for you. But he has this little old man look to him as well. He doesn't look like a baby, but a miniature adult. His eyebrows and eyelashes are so light or nonexisten that his face is just so gorgeous to me. When he sleeps on your shoulder his face looks completely like a baby, but when you lay him in the bed and look at him, it's the little old man face. When he is awake he has the brightest eyes and I can't wait to see what color they turn out to be ( our options are dark brown or light brown so not much mystery, but still).
I am so happy he is here. Pnut is trying to be a good helper and a great big sister. She has gotten better about not being so touchy. She really wants to help though so we are working our way through certain things. She started first grade yesterday so she is busy that way now as well.
It was a long journey to get our little man here. Lots of ultrasounds, no weight gain :) but lots of discomfort. I am happy to be in my bed again and be able to lay comfortably. My joints don't hurt anymore, my leg is no longer numb.
Cashew is almost two weeks old and I drove yesterday. Long trips are not in my future for another two or three weeks, but around town I am ok. No heavy lifting except my boy and maybe a gallon of milk. Thank you for all the prayers, visits, and meals! If you are looking for pics, please visit my FB, there are always new ones going up :)
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Where I talk about my choice
I don't consider myself a very brave person. I think that it is part of being a teacher to hide your vulnerabilities at times so that students don't get the upper hand. I think that kind of then drives other parts of me into a place where I don't show my true personality to a lot of people as well. This typically winds up being me being very non-confrontational with my problems but I can be quite vocal about my problems to third parties instead of addressing the issues directly. But, I guess by saying this I know what I am capable of so to speak.
So, why am I electing for a C-section? To say it's easier isn't really true. Is it easier? Yes. Will the recovery be easier? Who knows. When I had Pnut she was born at almost 10pm Tuesday and I was home walking around with minimal issues by Thursday at 8:30pm. This time around I am not getting my hopes up that my recovery will be as simple, but I can wish for it and see what happens.
My birthing experience with Pnut was not the ideal situation. Through more reading this time around I found that what happened with my body is actually something that happens to women a lot which calls for c-sections. I laugh this time around since my doctor has assured me this time will be more "civilized". A scheduled C-section is low key, low stress, there is more time to wait for medicines to kick in and after all that is the fact that you have an actual due date, not a guess.
So it turns out that I am addicted to baby birth shows when I am pregnant. I really shouldn't watch them so much, but it seems that there is a lack of programming or something right now because it seems like that is all I can find sometimes. As I watch the shows and see the different scenarios I find myself evaluating my decision to have an elected surgury and my decision just continues to be further cemented.
I admire women who know their bodies and limitations to the extent that they would choose to have a natural child birthing experience. I watch the different ones or hear people tell me stories and there is a little niggling in my brain that goes (you should try it) and then I remember what labor felt like before my body started reversing its progress and go, no not doing that again.
I can't wait to hear about the different birth stories that will be coming to me in the next few months. I think there are 4 besides myself at this point. Each experience is going to be different and that is the beauty of birth.
Now for the fear: I was asleep last time! I don't know what to expect during the surgery at all. I know the process, I know what is going to be done, but I have absolutely no idea what it is going to feel like! Crazy to think about for my second c-section. I always joke with people that I went to sleep and woke up with a baby. I question my sanity when I say, "Hmm, can I just do that again too?" Remember this is me the non-confrontational person. This is an example. Let's go with the most extreme scenario imaginable to escape a little bit of fear.
We are 3 days away.
Prayers for:
-Smooth surgery (this includes meds working when they should and procedures going swiftly)
-No surprises (the last c-section they found a cyst on my ovary and we had crazy issues from that for the next few months)
-Healthy baby Cashew
-A recovery that is not necessarily quick, but manageable
Thanks!
So, why am I electing for a C-section? To say it's easier isn't really true. Is it easier? Yes. Will the recovery be easier? Who knows. When I had Pnut she was born at almost 10pm Tuesday and I was home walking around with minimal issues by Thursday at 8:30pm. This time around I am not getting my hopes up that my recovery will be as simple, but I can wish for it and see what happens.
My birthing experience with Pnut was not the ideal situation. Through more reading this time around I found that what happened with my body is actually something that happens to women a lot which calls for c-sections. I laugh this time around since my doctor has assured me this time will be more "civilized". A scheduled C-section is low key, low stress, there is more time to wait for medicines to kick in and after all that is the fact that you have an actual due date, not a guess.
So it turns out that I am addicted to baby birth shows when I am pregnant. I really shouldn't watch them so much, but it seems that there is a lack of programming or something right now because it seems like that is all I can find sometimes. As I watch the shows and see the different scenarios I find myself evaluating my decision to have an elected surgury and my decision just continues to be further cemented.
I admire women who know their bodies and limitations to the extent that they would choose to have a natural child birthing experience. I watch the different ones or hear people tell me stories and there is a little niggling in my brain that goes (you should try it) and then I remember what labor felt like before my body started reversing its progress and go, no not doing that again.
I can't wait to hear about the different birth stories that will be coming to me in the next few months. I think there are 4 besides myself at this point. Each experience is going to be different and that is the beauty of birth.
Now for the fear: I was asleep last time! I don't know what to expect during the surgery at all. I know the process, I know what is going to be done, but I have absolutely no idea what it is going to feel like! Crazy to think about for my second c-section. I always joke with people that I went to sleep and woke up with a baby. I question my sanity when I say, "Hmm, can I just do that again too?" Remember this is me the non-confrontational person. This is an example. Let's go with the most extreme scenario imaginable to escape a little bit of fear.
We are 3 days away.
Prayers for:
-Smooth surgery (this includes meds working when they should and procedures going swiftly)
-No surprises (the last c-section they found a cyst on my ovary and we had crazy issues from that for the next few months)
-Healthy baby Cashew
-A recovery that is not necessarily quick, but manageable
Thanks!
Monday, August 15, 2011
It's almost here!
So as compared to my appointment two weeks ago, this one was very smooth. My appointment was an hour earlier than the last one and I was out in 20 minutes. Thank you Lord! I really didn't think I could handle waiting another 2 hours like the last time.
Cashew heartbeat was a good rate at 140. He is still head down which is good too because despite me having a C-section when babies are head down for sections it makes the procedure faster too.
It would appear that I have finally gained weight. Two weeks ago I had gained about 3 pounds and today it seems I have gained another 3. Since my first appointment in January was in the afternoon and my last two appointments have been in the morning I have been trying to keep up with that differential. Usually I weigh myself in the morning on the day by weeks change. So as compared to my other weekly weights in the morning I am at 6 pounds gained. I count this as a blessing since for women my size we are not supposed to gain more than 15 pounds.
So now we are at T minus 12 days until my C-section. I have had moments of nesting and am feeling ready finally. At first I was wanting to do things to get ready but it felt too early to start, but now it is so close so having the things finally done feels really good.
Our family is going to change so much with Cashew coming. I still don't know how it is possible to go from 3-4 without an emotional upheaval. You are used to loving two people and suddenly here is another person that enters the mix and will be new and loved the same. We will see how that goes for us, it will definitely be an adventure. :)
Cashew heartbeat was a good rate at 140. He is still head down which is good too because despite me having a C-section when babies are head down for sections it makes the procedure faster too.
It would appear that I have finally gained weight. Two weeks ago I had gained about 3 pounds and today it seems I have gained another 3. Since my first appointment in January was in the afternoon and my last two appointments have been in the morning I have been trying to keep up with that differential. Usually I weigh myself in the morning on the day by weeks change. So as compared to my other weekly weights in the morning I am at 6 pounds gained. I count this as a blessing since for women my size we are not supposed to gain more than 15 pounds.
So now we are at T minus 12 days until my C-section. I have had moments of nesting and am feeling ready finally. At first I was wanting to do things to get ready but it felt too early to start, but now it is so close so having the things finally done feels really good.
Our family is going to change so much with Cashew coming. I still don't know how it is possible to go from 3-4 without an emotional upheaval. You are used to loving two people and suddenly here is another person that enters the mix and will be new and loved the same. We will see how that goes for us, it will definitely be an adventure. :)
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